Member-only story
It Is What It Is
Acceptance or toleration?
We’ve all been there, where life hands you moments that defy explanation. Wins that can’t be completely celebrated, challenges that don’t have a resolution, or situations that simple exist.
In these moments, one phrase rises to the surface, “It is what it is” or a verbal shoulder shrug. This symbolic shoulder shrug wrapped in resignation got me thinking about my own experiences. Was it being used as a throwaway line? Or was it my way to let go and move forward?
Spilling coffee on my brand-new shirt right before an interview. It is what it is. Missing the bus by a few seconds with pouring rain outside. It is what it is. Trying a new recipe that didn’t turn out in the way that I want. It is what it is. Sitting in traffic to an already-late concert. It is what it is.
As humans, we’re not wired to let go and move on. It’s a difficult thing to do. We like having control and taking charge of things. We can always fix things — even when the odds are placed against us, right?
For example, If I were to take the coffee-spilling incident, I could have blot the stain with a wet napkin. But, I would have been late for my interview. Instead, I attended the interview with the stain and a smile. I decided to crack a joke about it, have genuine conversations, and land the job.
These experiences have taught me that sometimes there can be situations that are out of your control, and the only way forward is to accept them and move on. It’s a learning curve — so find humor in that spilled coffee, grace in missed opportunities, and strength to move on.
/NM
